Porn & Objectification

Wikipedia:

“Sexual objectification is the act of treating a person as a mere object of sexual desireObjectification more broadly means treating a person as a commodity or an object without regard to their personality or dignity. Objectification is most commonly examined at the level of a society, but can also refer to the behavior of individuals and is a type of dehumanization.”

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”
― Gandhi

The actual act of sexualy objectifying a person walking passed on the street or at the beach is not something that just happens overnight, or something some people “just do”.

It is a developed behaviour that takes time to develop and it happens gradually without the person actually being away of the process.

The good news is that you can reverse and stop the behaviour all together.

By not engaging in activities that fuel the behaviour watching porn or acting out in sex addiction, and actively working to stop the behaviour.

“I know this to be true because it is something I see in my clients as well as being something I experienced myself during my twelve years of porn addiction”

Do you need help to recover from porn or sex addiction?

Are you a partner to an addict and need to heal from the emotions and trauma?

 

Frequent porn use can have different effects on men and women, due to the nature of the message porn is sending out.

For Men:

Porn consumption ⇒ objectification of women* + and/or sexual dysfunction + and/or lack of satisfaction (emotionally and physically) within real-life relationships.

For Women:

Porn consumption ⇒ self-objectification  body anxiety  adoption of harmful coping mechanisms and/or sexual dysfunction.

What is absolutely crucial for both men and women in order to regain sovereignty over their sexual behaviour and life in general is to be intentional in their life, and stop watching porn.

It is important to note that sexual objectification and dehumanisation get adopted by men and women who frequently watch porn.

It happens slightly different however.

It is due to how porn portraits men and women.

  • Women are often portraited as submissive partners to men. Suggesting male superiority.
  • Men are often shown without faces or out of focus, rendering the actual human useless or even obsolete.

Long term effects for men and women include:

  • Demolished self-esteem.
  • Worsened self-image.
  • Anxiety.
  • A warped image of the opposite sex.
  • Body anxiety (although more common among women).

Let’s step out of ourselves for a moment.

What does it feel like to be objectified in that moment when you recognise the look you are receiving?

What would it feel like to see how your own daughter is being objectified in a restaurant, on the beach, during a sport event?

What does it feel like to be dehumanised?

What habits and core values do we want to pass down to the next generation?

Exercise to reverse your sexual objectification:

Whenever you catch yourself objectifying someone or dehumanising someone that might be walking past you or standing ahead of you in line at the store.

Add a story to this person.

She/he might be a parent, someone’s sibling someone’s child.

The person might be on the way to a hospital for a final visit of a dying parent or a critically injured friend.

Or it might just be an ordinary day in this person’s life.

Always end the thought with:

I don’t know and it is NONE OF MY BUSINESS.

Now shift focus towards someone who matters to you, what might they be doing right now? Is there something you can do for them today?

What you are doing through the exercise is to focus on the human, the actual person rather than physical attributes or the situation that might have triggered you.

You are then shifting focus towards people who matters deeply to you, and asking yourself if you can aid them. Focusing on compassion.

Source

Do you need help to recover from porn or sex addiction?

Are you a partner to an addict and need to heal from the emotions and trauma?

My best wishes to all of you who are battling porn & sex addiction, and to all you partners who are facing your emotions and experiences.

Help is available to you right now.

 

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